Wax On, Wax Off...With Travolta & Mrs Jones

From Paris With Love continues Luc Besson's drive to remain the number one producer of bullshit action films in the world today. While old skool rival, Joel Silver (he of Action Jackson, Romeo Must Die, Fair Game) keeps knocking them out (see The Losers), no one currently has such a vested interest in the mass manufacturing and distribution of gleefully simplistic and violent action thrillers as Besson. The Transporter films, Danny The Dog, Kiss Of The Dragon...all Euro shot, English language, medium budgeted, kinetic adult dramas with a huge dollop of escapism.

'From Paris' is from Taken director Pierre Morel, who ditches the focused intensity of Liam Neeson to the more chaotic rock 'n' roll of John Travolta. The tone of the film follows Travolta's lead, leaving more room for fun and wisecracking...while sticking to the primary law of maximum carnage. This is Besson's attempt at a Shane Black movie; mismatched partners (one a conformist brain box with a family life, the other a highly trained, hot-dog, law-enforcer with a disregard for the rules) team up to fight bad guys. As the title suggests, this one is more spy themed than Taken was...with a distinct flavor of 24 and Bourne thrown into the mix...although a far more preposterous version than of either of those.

The movie rests on is leads, and is in that respect, only partially successful. Travolta, as expected, is having a field day playing maverick spy Charlie Wax. Cursing, killing, singing and swaggering; no one plays baddies with as much gusto as Travolta. If you though he was off the leash in Pelham 123, then triple that for his portrayal of a super-spy here (the bonkers bloke even has a custom gun called Mrs Jones!) Rhys Myers, while having the straight role of the two, is simply too stiff to play his uptight partner. He's not awful and he gets the job done, but he's in a completely different game than Travolta's playing...and you need an actor to emphasise and identify with, rather than one that's simply going through the motions.

The action's cool, as anticipated, including a great car chase on the French motorway with Travolta brandishing a rocket launcher. Thank you Mr Besson for another stylish, dumb-but-fun Euro-thriller. With Columbiana, a Zoe Saldana starring action fest on the horizon, it looks like his reign will continue. Viva la France!

Loving The Angle Of The Dangle

There's nothing more disappointing than a movie you've been waiting months, or even years, to see...only for it to be a piece of crap. Quantum Of Solace. The Happening. Escape From L.A. Oh how you should have been great. On the flip side, there's the films you weren't expecting much from that turn out to be amazing. The Losers is one of the latter. The reviews for this medium budgeted bullshit actioner were distinctly average; a three-stars-out-of-five kind of a deal. There will be tons of action, a bare bones, brain dead plot and some corny quips and throw-away dialogue... and that will be that...or so I thought. For, while The Losers is all of those things, it's so much else too, making it the biggest, most welcome surprise hit movie of the year.

The ensemble are uniformly excellent, recalling the easy, warm banter of the Firefly crew, The Robin of Sherwood outlaws and the Colonial Marines of LV426. They might bicker...but they love each other really, and they can read each others minds when it comes to executing a fluid military operation. And that's down to the amazing casting of Jeffery Dean Morgan (a gruff Clooney-type), Idris Elba (argumentative and opinionated), Chris Evans (never better...or funnier), Zoe Saldana (never more bad-ass or more sexy), Columbus Short (all heart and humour) and Oscar Jaenada (the quiet one). To counter-act the brilliance of our beloved good guys there's the mega-evil Jason Patric, whose trademark, dead-eye delivery is utterly perfect for channelling the sarcasm and contempt he has for all other human beings. His Bondian-styled villain trading barbed quips with henchman Holt McCallany are among the movie's best moments, setting a tone which is out and out comic book in nature (appropriate given it's based on a DC picture book).

The script is another reason for it's success being constantly witty in even the most routine and formulaic of scenes. Moments in the story that might ordinarily be obligatory in order to get the team from point A to point B become ingrained on the memory thanks to astute choices in music (Skunk Anansie, Street Sweeps Social Club...and surprisingly, Journey), wardrobe (Morgans suit/Saldana's pants), location...or mainly cause there's a bunch of gung-ho lads (Saldana included) having a grand ol' time. Director Sylvian White gives the film a distinct gritty-yet-colourful look, adding lots of post-modern touches and keeps a sure hand on the editing process to ensure that the comic timing is at 100% and the action gripping.

As you'll know from this blog, I'm a huge fan of the "Action Bullshit" genre, of which The Losers fits in snugly. In fact, if the genre ever needed a contemporary champion to show other film-makers the way, then this little beauty is ranks up there with Crank in terms of mixing the funnies with the frantic.

Laugh, I Nearly Shat! - May Edition

Here we have a few questions left unanswered by the LOST finale, last week...



Below is a suggestion as to how Arnie's Predator should have ended...



The next animation isn't pop culture related...it's just rude and childish and makes me laugh...



Here's a Star Wars themed spoof of a recent Google ad...



And finally, if you've never seen it, the short film The Wizard of Speed and Time. It always raises a giggle...

TV Round Up - 2009 / 2010 Summary

With the current 2009/2010 season of U.S. television coming to an end, I'd thought I'd look back to see where the state of the industry currently stands. With classics like 24 and Lost finishing their highly successful runs (neither included here) and with critics hailing modern TV as being in a golden era thanks to the likes of The Sopranos, West Wing, The Wire and ER..the big question is...are we still in a golden age.

So in reverse order:-

14/ FlashForward - An interesting premise but which didn't have enough disparate elements to it's mystery (like Lost had) to keep an audience glued in the long run. Plus, the dullest ensemble assembled for a major network drama. Only Dominic Monaghan had the capability to turn his character into something memorable.
Even the season finale was as predictable as tap water.

13/ Star Wars - The Clone Wars. A disappointing second season from Mr Lucas. The epic three-part war stories are still magnificent, but there's been too much fannying around with lesser characters like bounty hunters, droids, politicians and second tier Jedi doing lots of dull scheming to excel like the show did last year. But it's still the best looking kids animated TV show ever produced.

12/ V. This remake of the classic 80's mini series is substandard in virtually every way...the effects included. Like FlashForward, the cast are spectacularly dull...especially compared with the likes of Marc Singer and Michael Ironside. And the changes they've made to the story structure to accommodate a long running network show only serve to make the story less compelling. Only the stunning, but ruthlessly cold Morena Bacarrin deserves credit here. If this doesn't improve, it will be going to the recycle bin for bad tele.

11/ American Dad. The least successfully (and by that I mean least consistently funny) of Seth MaFarlane's network animation comedies. But with assholes character like Stan and Roger still going strong, it's still required viewing.

10/ Dollhouse. Joss Whedon's science fiction show took it's time to establish both a consistent tone and format, but eventually did so with style. Perhaps the most intelligent of Whedon's work to date, it was occasionally a little too dense and talky for it's own good, lacking the trademark wit for a more serious thriller show.
But original and daring were part of it's make up which was remarkable for a FOX network show.

9/ Real Time With Bill Maher. If you want to see what's going on politically in the USA, and want to see a frank, open discussion about it, look no further than Real Time. Maher's a bit set in his opinions, and his stand up delivery's a little smug, but the debates with politicians, journalists and celebs are fascinating. The Daily Show gently mocks the establishment. Maher rips it down and stomps on it's head.

8/ The Cleveland Show. The new spin off from Family Guy might have been an off-shoot too far, but it's an improvement over American Dad. The new characters are great, particularly wise ass toddler Rollo and next door neighbour/grizzly bear Tim, and Cleveland's character itself has been allowed to expand.

7/ Caprica. Still only half way through its first season, with the remain nine episodes to be shown in the autumn, the Battlestar Galactica spin-off practical taunts the hosting SyFy channel to take it off the air. Why? It's ultra intelligent, hard school science fiction, deadly serious in tone, with stupidly high production standards and a cast with gravitas and a half.

6/ Stargate Universe. I've watched this in the hope that series lead Robert Carlyle could add some class to the ultra-brainless Stargate franchise. He has. Take Star Trek: Voyager, mix in some of the Stargate mythos (while cleverly leaving the bulk of the confusing back story out of the picture)...all presented in the style of Battlestar. The cast are better than average, the plots very rarely involve aliens...instead coming from the drama of being trapped far from home. And unlike Trek...the characters seldom trust each other making unpredictability the norm. Surprisingly good.

5/ Family Guy. The original and still the best. Sharper, more cutting and braver than it's sister shows, Family Guy rules. Peter Griffin is still perhaps one of the greatest sitcom characters of all time backed up by gags that have been absorbed into the culture..."Roadhouse!"

4/ 30 Rock. I've only discovered this sitcom this year (now in it's forth season, but it's the best live action half hour comedy I've seen since Friends finished. The stupid off-beat humour is straight out of Family Guy, the references are topical and geeky and the performances at once both very silly and realistically grounded. And star Tina Fey is a nerdy, loser genius.

3/ Spartacus: Blood & Sand. There's never been anything like this on TV ever, not only in terms of it's weekly gladiator training drama, but in it's outrageously over the top production style, violence, nudity, swearing and sex. By Jupiter's Cock, the most original show of the season.

2/ Castle. Not as deep or as dramatic as many of the shows on the list, Castle is definitely the most fun. Never mind the weekly whodunit plots, it's the character interactions of The Fillion (who should be in everything, trade mark) with the composed but sophisticated Stana Katic and his off-beat (but adorable) family. Funny too.

1/ Fringe. Season 2 has developed not only the greater series over-arcing plot (of a war with a parallel dimension Earth) but the central trio of Olivia, Peter and Walter and their relationships. The weekly, X-Files style story lines are still fresh, it's delivered with considerable style and they're not frightened to take the odd risk (eighties themed and musical tinged episodes this year). Ending with a great cliffhanger, Fringe is the one great hope we have left in the absence of Lost and 24.

A solid line up then, but not a golden age collection of TV. There's nothing in the Fall line up that suggests there's any more 'classic' stuff on the way, with the exception maybe off the JJ Abrams Undercovers. Outside of that, it's a game of wait and see.

New Daughter, Old News

Like Denzel Washington (see below) Kevin Cosnter is another actor with a strong quality control. He might not be in favor anymore (it's probably 15 years since he was A-list) but he's generally picked projects that range from fantastic (Thirteen Days) to solid (The Guardian). Costner movies, on the whole, also have a distinctly old-fashioned quality to them...taking their time to establish character, situations and dramatic tension. All these aspects are in play in his new supernatural thriller The New Daughter...apart from one. The quality.

It's well made (by Luis Berdejo, writer of the REC movies). Well acted. And has an intriguing central premise as newly divorced writer moves into the obligatory creepy country house with his two kids. The eldest teenage daughter is strangely drawn to a mound in the expansive back yard...which isn't quite the Indian Burial ground that Kev suspects it is. The scares don't really work, the set-pieces lack tension (a crime for a movie designed to make you poop yourself) and the final revelation lacks any real horror...just a feeling of 'Oh my. How scientifically interesting and inconvenient. Kev himself is as capable a leading man as he's ever been and no one will be happier than me when his career is resurrected back to the big leagues. But that outcome will be less and less probable if Kev permanently loses the quality control as he has with The New Daughter. List under 'spectacularly average'.

Eli's Apocalyptic Bible Bashing

There's a small group of actors that don't make bad movies. Tom Cruise is one. Michael Douglas is another. Sure some may be a little weaker than the classics om their CV, but they have little, if anything, that all-out sucks. Denzel's another one to add to the list. Sometimes he plays it safe (Pelham 123), sometimes he doesn't (Training Day). But there's a certain guarantee of quality when Mr Washington releases a movie.

In many respects, The Book Of Eli could be considered a risk for Denzel, it being an unsubtle, minimalist, post apocalyptic western; highly stylised (one might argue, arty) and so very obvious in terms of sub text. This movie could very well have been Denzel's The Postman...trying to be cool AND intelligent but ultimately ending up dumb. It's thanks to The Hughes Brother, they of From Hell, that The Book Of Eli is one entertaining film. Perhaps because of my love of John Carpenter films, but 'Eli' has a slow, confident approach that I love. Often the camera is still and the takes are long. Often the dialogue is minimal and the score atmospheric. The directors rely on strong brooding performances and beautifully composed visuals to show Eli's quest to deliver a mysterious book (bloody obviously a Bible) to the west. He encounters Gary Oldman's ruthless Overlord (gloriously chewing the furniture for the first time in years) who seeks a Bible, which have virtually all been destroyed in the apocalypse, to manipulate his townsfolk. Ray Stephenson and Mili Kunis deliver surprisingly strong work while Malcolm McDowell and Michael Gambon turn up in small but significant cameos.

There's nothing original or clever in the way the story plays out (we're deep, deep in the established Western genre here) or in the way that religion is examined (the negative aspects of faith along with the good). In fact it's examination of faith is shown in an extremely similar manner in The Road...although with much more subtlety. But subtle doesn't always equate to better. Eli is a supremely entertaining movie thankfully down to the strong vision of it's directors and the conviction of all the actors involved. You might argue that it's style over substance at the end of the day, but if a movie's as mesmerizing as this (bullshit chopsocky 'n' all) then I'll always argue that the style IS the substance.

Ashes To Ashes: Everything That Has A Beginning, Has An End - Part 1

Once upon a time, between the mid eighties and the mid noughties, British fantasy on TV was a barren wasteland populated by boring, unimaginative dirge like Crime Traveller and Invasion Earth. Then came Doctor Who's resurrection in 2005, which gave TV networks the confidence to green light not only new SF/fantasy shows, but well written ones too. The first of these post-Who series to hit was Life On Mars, a period set cop show with a twist. The protagonist was from 2006, trapped solving crimes in 1973. What made the show a critical success was the mystery as to how hero Sam Tyler got to 1973. Had he travelled back in time? Was he in a Coma, dreaming? Was he dead, stuck in purgatory? And it was the fusing of these fantasy elements into a popular police drama format that made the series a commercial success.

In 2007 it was revealed that Sam had been in a Coma, the 1973 stories apparently being all in his head. But with the desire of lead John Simm to depart, it was decided to revamp the series to an early eighties setting with a new lead. Thus, Ashes to Ashes was born with Keeley Hawes taking over as out-of-time, comatose cop Alex Drake. With Drake now inhabiting the same universe that Sam Tyler had, the central mystery shifted to why it was the same dreamworld and characters as Sam's.
A greater importance was also placed on the meaning of top cop Gene Hunt in the eighties universe.

In all 5 years of both series, the casting was impeccable, from Marshall Lancaster's confidence-lacking Chris, to Dean Andrews fearless performance as the bullish, politically incorrect Ray. But the enduring icon af Ashes/Mars will forever be Phil Glennister's DCI Gene Hunt, the swaggering, arrogant, hard as nails Police Chief that dominated the show, even if he wasn't in a scene. Many of the greatest fictional characters in TV history have been those with uncompromising contempt for all other human beings. Just look at Blackadder, Basil Fawlty and Al Bundy. Gene was one of those. His insults were legendary...but it was the venom with which they were delivered which ensured the success of the show (which the Americans failed to understand when they were casting, both the inadequate Colm Meaney and Harvey Kietel, in their unfortunate version of Life On Mars). He didn't care who he shot, punched, insulted or hurt; we loved him anyway.

The Ashes to Ashes finale which broadcast recently was pitch perfect. It revealed a powerful mythology behind the dreamworld, moving back-stories for the regular cast and, perhaps best of all, used English iconography illustrate the mythology (the good old British boozer). Moving, powerful and satisfying...the episode was a great end to a landmark British series. Gene might be gone, but it makes you feel safe knowing that DCI Hunt is looking out for us.