The (not probable) return of John Carpenter

Once master director of Halloween and The Thing, John Carpenter, has been content to slip into semi retirement of late, dragging himself away from the televised basket ball to make two TV episodes.

Now he has two films in development. One is "The Prince", a gangster movie

. The other, "Riot" is a prison set Nicholas Cage starrer.

Will he actually make one of these? Has he any remaining talent?

I'd like vto think so. But then, I believe in Santa Claus...

Places Never To Visit Part 1 : France

A bunch of hardened criminals escape to the countryside where they encounter some nutter French Nazis. A bit like Texas Chainsaw...but with French Nazis. And more blood. Nice!

"You're surrounded by armed bastards!"

Harvey Keitel (pictured right) is portraying the character of Gene Hunt in the American version of UK hit "Life on Mars". The original role was played by Phil Glenister.

The kids of today will start thinking that Harvey Keitel is the definitive Gene H....

Oh. Never mind.

Rob Rage Part 2: All New STAR TREK 2009

Next May, the man behind Lost and Alias will bring us a reinvention of the original Star Trek. It will reinterpret the costumes, sets, spaceships and storylines that endeared us (well, the geeky among us) to the 60's series. In doing so, it will recast young contemporary actor in the classic roles of Captain Kirk, Mr Spock, Scotty etc.

And thats cool. It should be fun, epic and looks set to treat the source material with respect.

But.... some kids are gonna think that Chris Pine (pictured second left) will be the proper, definitive interpretation of Captain James T Kirk. They'll think that William Shatner was hammy, corny and unconvincing.

And that ,my friends, is blasphemy!!! It may be true, but still. Blasphemy! Viva La Shat!

Rob Rage Part 1: The All-New Guns N Roses

Well, after 14 years wait, the new Guns N Roses album is finally with us. I understand it's selling pretty well... which I would expect for a brand name that can still sell out stadium gigs worldwide.

Unfortuntely, it's not that great. There's only a handful of great songs on there and the rest are pleasent ditties you can do the washing up to. It's not bad...not at all. But strip away all the production values and you've got tunes you couldn't remember, even if Jack Bauer himself was interogating you!

What's sad though is kids buying this album today will think this is the definitive Guns N Roses (even though Axel Rose is the only remaining original contributor). They'll think that Appetite for Destruction stuff is dated and Daddys Rock. Poor buggers.