THE FINAL FRONTIER - Part 2 - "Starcrash"
How the hell is it that I've not seen 1978's Starcrash? First and foremost I'm a huge science fiction geek with a almost obsessive love of cinematic Space Opera. Then there's the Caroline Munroe factor; I had a massive crush on her as a wee lad, ever since her skimpy role in At The Earth's Core. And now I've seen it I know why I avoided it. Yep, it's crap.
I'd hoped this low budget Star Wars rip off might have had a similar injection of behind the scenes talent as Roger Corman's exploitation rip-off Battle Beyond The Stars, but it was too much to hope for. There's no point in listing Starcrash's weaknesses for the whole film is flawed from top to bottom. But there are a few gems in the swamp of sci-fi cheese...
1/ What the hell is the excellent Christopher Plummer doing in this? Sure, the film benefits from his restrained gravitas, but he's waaaay too good for this.
2/ What the hell is Bond composer John Barry doing here? Sure the film benefits from his stately orchestrations, but he's way to good for this.
3/ Munroe. Mmmmmm. A terrible actress but her curvaceous, bikini clad heroine makes this the only reason to keep watching.
I had absolutely no idea what was going on, why Marjoe Gortner's chisel-jawed Jedi-ish hero Akton had powers, why The Hoff was in it at all or why the cavemen attacking The Hoff looked like they escaped from a Monty Python sketch. Utterly awful...but charming in a so-bad-it's-good kind of way.
