Susan's Plan (To Flush John Landis' Career Down The Tubes)

There's no doubt about it; director John Landis is a legend. In terms of top genre film making Landis has made the best musical of all time in The Blues Brothers, the best comedy of all time with Animal House, the greatest music video of all time with Michael Jackson's Thriller and the best straight-up horror film of all time with An American Werewolf In London. But there's also a lot of inconsistency in his career including the fantastic (Trading Places, Oscar, Coming To America), mediocre films (Spies Like Us, Three Amigos, Beverly Hills Cop III) and the outright shit ones (Innocent Blood, Blues Bothers 2000, Into The Night). There's only a few of his works I've yet to see and until a couple of days ago that included 1998's Susan's Plan.

Susan's Plan is a comedy thriller, penned by Landis, and stars Nastassja Kinski in the centre of a convoluted caper plot to kill her ex-husband in a murderous life insurance scam. Along for the ride in this Tarantino-esque inspired concoction are C-listers Michael Biehn, Billy Zane, Rob Schneider, Thomas Hayden Church, Bill Duke, Lara Flynn Boyle and Dan Ackroyd who to a lesser or greater degree, get the quirky tone Landis is gunning for. Surprisingly, diva Flynn Boyle nails her role best with a ditzy, airheaded performance as a hustling skank with Biehn giving her a run for her money as a killer with the mindset of a young teen.

Despite the cast and director, Susan's Plan is awful. The script is dire, little of the humour translates through the situations and characters on to the screen and very little of that signature Landis magic is visible in the comic timing. The pacing is slow, tonally it has trouble jumping between serious and humorous the way American Werewolf pulled off so perfectly, and it goes absolutely nowhere.
Thankfully Landis was to redeem himself on the excellent Masters Of Horror episode Deer Woman, but considering this cluster cuss, it's amazing he achieved even that feat.

Double Trouble

Now in his fourth decade as a movie star it's amazing Richard Gere still hasn't retired or migrated, like many of his peers, to the now very respectable land of TV.
But make movies the man still does, the latest of which is the espionage thriller The Double. Gere stars as an FBI agent brought out of retirement to track down Cassius, a Russian spy and serial killer on US soil who was once thought long dead. He's teamed up with the Topher(Predators)Grace as a enthusiastic and naive young Agent and it's pretty early into their investigation that the first big twist is revealed. SPOILER ALERT. Gere IS Cassius.

From then on it's much like No Way Out with the main character trying to derail the investigation that will ultimately lead them to his front door. Of course, Grace, and bubbly wife Odette Yustman, are in ever increasing danger as Grace gets closer and closer to unraveling the truth. Unfortunately, it's so blandly written and directed by Michael Brandt (the writer of Wanted and 2 Fast 2 Furious) that much of the dramatic tension is squandered in a story that frequently feels TV movie-ish.
While it's great to see high stakes espionage movies being produced, especially while the likes of Bourne, Bond, Bauer and Jack Ryan take a breather, it's a shame this never really soars, even with a last minute twist.

Ghostbusters 1921

The Awakening is an unexpectedly effective period ghost story in the vein of The Turn Of The Shrew. Well produced by BBC Film with a great cast led by Rebecca Hall with strong support from Dominic West and Imedla Staunton, it features the efforts of an independent an educated woman in 1921 to disproved that a children's Boarding School is haunted.

It's atmospheric and tense with enough character stuff to keep things moving along quite nicely, with the central hook for the audience being whether the events are real or faked. As with all ghost stories since The Sixth Sense, this is rather dependant on a final act twist, which fortunately works well, despite what some mopey critics might have you believe. There is an odd subplot about a slightly bonkers groundsman that has no business being in the narrative at all, but that aside, The Awakening is well worth your time.

John Carter & A Princess Of Mars

Disney's John Carter has been getting quite a bit of attention recently, but unfortunately not for the right reasons. Whether it be its decades in the making production, an untested animation director, its $250 million plus mega-budget, derivative and over-familiar story and set-pieces, confidence lacking in the title department, a vague and confusing marketing campaign, the outdated 95 year old source material or an unworthy, meat-headed lead actor...poor John Carter has had a lot to overcome, even prior to its theatrical release. Rather surprisingly, what has emerged is a bloody entertaining piece of romantic, pulpy, sci-fi adventure...much in the spirit of the Edgar Rice Burroughs books on which the screenplay was based.

Despite all the moaning that the film resembles Attack Of The Clones visually (there's a gladiator verses monster battle in a giant desert area) and Avatar (the hero's consciousness is transported to a superhuman body where he leads a rebellion and saves the girl)the thing that John Carter most reminds me of is Flash Gordon...both the 1980 film and the old black and white serials. It feels very episodic as Carter is thrust from one escapade top another meeting allies, adversaries, mentors, friends and most importantly, a lover in Dejah Thoris the princess of the city of Helium. It's the first science fiction epic in a long time that has captured the essence of the fun, serial adventure that made 1977's Star Wars such a blast (and something the prequels that were too bogged down with backstory to include).

The film is a great exercise is world building as we are slowly gradually introduced to the planet of Mars, or Barsoom as the natives call it, and to it's antagonistic cultures one by one from the 9 foot tall, four armed Tharks to the mystical, meddling Therns. To many, especially in these days where CGI can create any environment imaginable, Barsoom may seem disappointingly familiar. But with the majority of the film being filmed in a desert setting for real with FX being used to augment and enhance the original image, this version of Mars is very easy to identify with allowing the audience to put themselves in John Carter's shoes. The effects there are (and the money is certainly up there on the screen) is some of the best I've seen in recent years and goes some way of making the setting feel authentic.

Wall-E director does a great job of balancing the adventure with drama (Carter's tragic past is handled very effectively without being intrusive), comedy (the hero's Earthbound escape attempts amuse), action, character development and story. This is a great story, even if it is one that has been mimicked a 100 times over the 95 years since the book was written, that's extremely well told. And when I mean well told, I mean in a steady, unflashy, un-Michael Bay kind of way which may put off the youth market along with it's establishing period setting, abundance of loin-cloths, the classic orchestral score and its strong romantic tone (where the heroine isn't confined to emotionless blank stares).

Taylor Kitsch does a solid job as the title character; he's not a great actor by any means but he does possess the charismatic twinkle in his eye that the likes of Sam Worthington and Channing Tatum lack. The supporting cast are great on every level to he mocapped CG characters (a gruff and playful Willem Defoe particularly) to the more regal human(ish) cast including the ever dependable Mark Strong, swashbuckling James Purefoy, tyrant Dominic West and the wise Ciaran Hinds. Top honors goes to Lynn Collins who play the Princess Of Mars. Her Dejah Thoris is tough yet vulnerable, fierce yet fearful, smart yet naive and one of the most watchable female heroines to grace an adventure film in many a moon. It also doesn't help that her combination of graceful curves, high cheekbones, dark skin, black locks, piercing blue eyes and the plumiest posh totty English accent this side of Angelina's Lara Croft means she's destined to adorn my desktop wallpaper for several decades to come.

Despite the terrible marketing campaign the film has had to endure, John Carter still might struggle to find a wide audience, particularly with the youth crowd. Not only may they be put off with the perceived derivative style and plot and off-putting period setting but the old fashioned way the story is told may not be enough to capture their imagination. In many ways this reminds me of 2005's Sahara which also had a mega-budget, was film in a non-contemporary way, died at the global box office...and yet was outrageously well made and ten times more fun than it had any right to be. We may not get sequels out of this costly endeavour but there's enough greatness contained within to keep my geek brain entertained for years to come.

Menaced By The 3D Phantom

I've watch Star Wars Episode I The Phantom Menace many, many times since it's original 1999 release and even reviewed it in this hallowed blog about two and a half years ago (here). Being a huge Star Wars fan there was no way I was going to miss the opportunity to see Episode I on the big screen with its 3D re-release this year. The 3D wasn't important to me (I'm getting weary of this marketing gimmick and it rarely 'improves' the visual impact of the film) but it did allow a rare opportunity to see an impeccably designed fantasy film digitally projected on a screen as big as an AT-AT.

Since my first review of Episode I back in 2009, my opinion of the film has sank tragically into the depths of hell thanks to my nagging doubts being focused and confronted by Redlettermedia's Mr Plinkett, an unsavory character whose feature lengthy Star Wars prequel reviews have become the stuff of Internet legend. Rather than going into detail about the film's many, many faults (including the stiff acting, non-existent characterisation, logic defying plotting, inappropriate political guff, static direction, and far too many shots of characters siting and walking and walking and sitting) you'll be much better informed by going straight to the source and checking out Plinkett for yourselves here.

Still the awfulness of the story and characters can't detract from the fact this is a Star Wars film, plain and simple. That means space battles, a fully realised and ever expanding science fiction universe, immaculately designed landscapes, props, costumes, vehicles and planets, a lush and sweeping John Williams score,some still impressive visual effects, a solid 3D conversion, and space battles. He might not be able to direct actors or conjure a coherent plot but Lucas can still orchestrate action like few others. All the action sequences, particularly the podrace and the final battle of Naboo are all first rate cinema and the Jedi/Sith lightsaber battle still has the ability to have one shouting at the screen for Mr McGregor to laser sword Ray Park's Darth Maul into oblivion.

Great to see again, mainly because it manages to transport me back to the mindset of a seven year old boy, although despite its moments of greatness I have to acknowledge that much of The Phantom Menace is dire shit.

March Pick N Mix

Cool Game Of Thrones inspired Simpsons opening credits...

Rare & Under Appreciated: Quigley Down Under

The popularity of the western genre died out in the 1970's, but a few gems have managed to creep out over the years since. One of these is the little seen Quigley Down Under which tried to capitalise on the post Magnum P.I, Three Men & A Baby appeal of leading man Tom Selleck who plays the title role with his trademark rugged masculinity and stoic, charismatic, laconic attitude.

While the story is nothing special Quigley Down Under does have plenty to recommend it. The story is spiced up by this being an Australian set 'western' and having the hero being a skilled rifelman rather than the usual cliched gunslinger, David (Mad Max) Eggby's cinematography perfectly capture that sunsoaked, dusty, wild west look, director Simon (Lonesome Dove) Wincer finds the perfect tonal balance between action, drama and humour, and composer Basil (RoboCop) Poledouris delivers possibly his best ever score which ramps the movie quality up 50% just with its very presence. Let's not forget the spunky Laura San Giacomo as the insane-or-is-she Crazy Cora and the unbeatable Alan Rickman doing one of his slimy masterclasses in villainy from the early 90's era.

Old fashioned, leisurely paced and a dingo load of fun, Quigley Down Under still rules.